The ingenuity and panache with which you make things exponentially worse whenever possible grants you the power to craft the 5 O'CLOCK SOMEWHERE.
It's like a tropical neon light show during happy hour on the worst day of your life. Probably works better as a distress signal in the case of overdosing from bottomless Dewgaritas than actual eyewear.
GRADE: B
ZEST: +18
VISIBILITY: -75
LUMINESCENCE: +90
DRAWBACK: Unable to find salt shakers in a 65 expanse radius.